Jennifer's Body

The French title for this film is Le Corpse de Jennifer. The use of the word corpse is quite appropriate here, cause this movie has all the life of one. Boom Zing.

Gripes
You know I bet if you wrote a quirky little screenplay about a clever teen preggo that was critically acclaimed and made it all the way to the Oscars you'd be pretty high on yourself. I bet you'd feel like you could effing do anything, hell I bet that you'd think you could write a killer teen horror flick and knock it out of the park. Well, you'd be wrong. I'm sure everyone involved in the making of Jennifer's Body probably felt pretty good about the project. I mean hell, it stars sex pot Meghan Fox of 2 hour GM robot advertisement fame, the screenplay is written by none other than the writer of last years indie-breakout film Juno, and it's about teens having sex and getting eaten by a monster. What could go wrong? Plenty.

This movie is boring.  Just plain boring.  The action is boring, the writing is boring, and the acting is boring.  I think the reason that it is so boring is that no one cares, this is the ultimate hipster horror film in that everyone in it is too cool to care so there's no stakes because guess what; if you don't care, I don't care so why the hell are we all here, just turn off the movie and go home.

What Worked
The girl that plays the lead is a good actor and I could tell that she was trying to care which was probably discouraged on the set.  But she tried.

Is It Better than Dungeons and Dragons
Yes.

Mediocrity Scale
Less than Just Mediocre.  It tries to be subversive and good but ends up being boring and lame.

Food
I started writing this review over a year ago and have long forgotten what we ate; I'm sure it was bad for me.